Stop Suffering, Start Living Archives - Allison Evans Coaching

Do You Want to Be a Bigger Caterpillar? Or Do You Want to be a Butterfly?

One source of suffering is not having what you want. (“Stop Suffering, Start Living” is my theme for March. I chose it because it’s the end of winter and the beginning of spring for us in the northern hemisphere. It’s also the label that I’ve given the largest category of…

Allison EvansMarch 7, 2025

Stop Suffering, Start Living

To Nurture Your Intentions, Nourish Your Body

I love this time of year. New intentions and resolutions are being formed in the dark, cold, post-holiday quiet of January. By spring they’ll be in bud, and by summer, blooming. May I suggest a basic fertilizer? No matter what your intentions or resolutions, they will get a boost if…

Allison EvansJanuary 19, 2024

Stop Suffering, Start Living

Holiday Stress?

My client is a mom of three under seven – a big job on top of her big job. As we coached, she was surrounded by piles of outgrown clothes and toys, the detritus of a seasonal decluttering.“And now,” she announced incredulously, “we have to do presents!”I was supposed to…

Allison EvansNovember 22, 2023

Getting Things Done Stop Suffering, Start Living

Woman Sitting, Fingers Hovering Above a Keyboard

I was on retreat last week at The School for The Work. The Work is one of my favorite practices for finding clarity and freedom in daily life. The Work is a meditation. It doesn’t look like a meditation because it’s four questions, and questions look like cognitive tasks. But…

Allison EvansNovember 14, 2023

Stop Suffering, Start Living

Mental Jiu Jitsu for Getting Unstuck

“It is better to receive than to give. How might that be true?”My client inhaled sharply, then started to weep.She was drowning in responsibilities at work and at home. She had come to our call asking for solutions but kept batting away my ideas.More than one “Yeah, but” in a…

Allison EvansJuly 28, 2023

Getting Things Done Stop Suffering, Start Living

The Brain Huddle: A Science-based Tool to Resolve Internal Conflict

How do you resolve internal conflict – that pushing and pulling of the mind between different conclusions and opposed courses of action? It’s a bedeviling part of the human condition, to feel torn in this way. You can lose hours, days, even lifetimes back-and-forth-ing over what to make of the past…

Allison EvansJune 23, 2023

Stop Suffering, Start Living

Reflections on Boundaries (for Givers and Women and Anyone Who Struggles)

“You don’t have to be angry to set a boundary,” I said. “Wait, what?” my client replied. She and her husband were having a disagreement over something that seemed trivial: he wanted to watch the evening news during dinner; she wanted to eat without it. “I just don’t want to…

Allison EvansJune 7, 2023

Getting Things Done Stop Suffering, Start Living

Should I Stay or Should I Go? An Authentic Desire Tool to Help You Find Clarity

“I just don’t know if it’s worth it anymore.” My client was lamenting the struggles of her relationship. Things had been so easy and delicious in the early days. But after a year together, differences that had been overlookable were taking center stage. “Do the pros still outweigh the cons?”…

Allison EvansMay 26, 2023

Getting Things Done Stop Suffering, Start Living

What If You Don’t Know What You Want?

My client is one of the kindest people I know. She is patient, philosophical, and takes the high road and the long view. But she recently confessed to me that she didn’t know what I meant about “authentic desire.” “Is that some special category of wanting, some extra gear in desire that…

Allison EvansMay 12, 2023

Stop Suffering, Start Living

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