self-compassion Archives - Allison Evans Coaching

How to Unblock Your Capacity to Receive

Soft and ready to receiveWhen our firstborn was six weeks old, we had a Superbowl party. I put her down for a nap in the bassinet, which was next to the TV. We were all impressed with how she slept through the din. But as soon as the TV was…

Allison EvansFebruary 23, 2023

Getting Things Done Stop Suffering, Start Living

If You Hate Resolutions (but Still Desire Change)

Me at age 10: the year I starting hating resolutions. “I don’t want to set a resolution,” my client said at our first meeting of the new year. “I don’t like goals, either. They always fail.”Strong emotion almost always hides a desire for the thing being rejected: my client wanted…

Allison EvansJanuary 26, 2023

Love & Relationships Stop Suffering, Start Living

Finally Free

What you judge, you’re attached to. What you’re attached to, limits you. To release yourself from the limitations of attachments, release judgments. In other words: forgive.Forgiveness is close to my heart because last March I forgave something very big, and the results have astonished me: I feel freer than I ever have in…

Allison EvansSeptember 23, 2022

Stop Suffering, Start Living

After Tears and Rage, Insight: Three Vignettes

Above: That’s me on the left, at age four. She’s still inside me. (And my brother is still happy-go-lucky).I’ve been on vacation, and the space that opened up made room for some interesting events – high highs and low lows. After the first incident, I thought, “I’ve got to blog about…

Allison EvansAugust 25, 2022

Stop Suffering, Start Living

Put Away Childish Thinking

Last week I wrote about a miscommunication between my daughter and me. It happened years ago, but she brought it up recently in conversation, referring to it as a time I had “crushed a dream.” I call it a miscommunication because, at the time it happened, I had no idea…

Allison EvansMarch 4, 2021

Stop Suffering, Start Living

How to Help Unpleasant Memories Stay in the Past

(Not Intrude on the Present) My client reached out to me in a state. He was crazy with jealousy – emphasis on the crazy. He knew his feelings had nothing to do with his new wife’s behavior. He trusted her. But he had been cheated on before, and it…

Allison EvansFebruary 4, 2021

Stop Suffering, Start Living

I Need to Make a Decision

How to Invite the "Next Right Step" Last week I wrote about a new approach to New Year’s resolutions. What if you want to be resolved about something, but you’re not? You want to act – feel like you should or even need to – but you are deadlocked within…

Allison EvansJanuary 22, 2021

Getting Things Done

The New Pleasure Principle: A Lighter, More Effective Approach to Change

Happy New Year! Have you made any resolutions? If you have, you’re in good company. About half of Americans make them, and by far the most popular resolutions involve making changes to diet and exercise. Count me in that bunch! By the time New Year’s Day rolls around, I’ve been…

Allison EvansJanuary 15, 2021

Getting Things Done

How to Keep Your New Year’s Resolutions, Without Willpower or Self-Loathing

It was in life coach training that I finally became really curious about the phenomenon of the chronically unrealized desire: the dress size I could reach but never maintain; the French I never brushed up on; the savings plan I knew I should have but felt immediately behind on.

Allison EvansDecember 30, 2018

self-compassion

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